By Paul A. Anthony, Editor in Chief
Thanks should be given the Democratic party of New Jersey.
Its inventive reshaping of state law has created whole new worlds of opportunities for the losers and hopeless throughout the country.
When Robert Toricelli, the Democratic incumbent Senator dropped out of the race with Bob Forrester, Republicans cheered, but when the Democrats responded with another selection well after the deadline for replacing candidates had passed, the GOP booed. It hissed. It demanded state supreme court action.
And the state supreme court said that in the interests of giving New Jersey residents a fair choice (apparently three remaining candidates just isn’t fair enough), the switch would be allowed to take place.
Think about the possibilities we face now. In the political world, certainly, this will have amazing effects.
No longer will parties have to worry about a poor candidate facing a strong incumbent. Just replace him right before the election with someone famous or well-liked.
Such a scenario has been suggested for California, where governor Gray Davis is so disliked that almost any Republican could defeat him-except GOP candidate Bill Simon, whose campaign is just warming up. We hope.
Well, Republicans, take heart. Just replace Simon with someone who could-ahem-terminate Davis. Arnold Schwarzenegger was considering a run in 2004 anyway, and the party need not break any laws. The deadline for write-in candidates to submit the required 100 petition signatures is Oct. 22.
In Montana, Republican Senate hopeful Mike Taylor dropped out, accusing Democratic incumbent Max Baucus of defamation of character.
But Taylor’s not hiding his motives for leaving far after the 85-day-long candidate replacement deadline passed. His campaign spokeswoman told the Washington Post that he dropped out so they could find a candidate who could win. Amazing.
And imagine how history could have been affected. Republicans could have replaced Bob Dole with anyone else in 1996. Democrats could have done the same with Jimmy Carter in 1980. No longer will we have blowout elections like those that swept Ronald Reagan and George Bush the elder into power.
Every year, we can have nail-biting, chad-hanging, photo-finish contests that will boost ad revenue.
And lest we forget the private sector, let’s not forget how our children can learn that trying their hardest and falling a little short isn’t good enough. Especially when they can hire a smarter student-someone who has a better chance of winning, so to speak- to do their homework and take their tests for them.
So remember, ACU students, if you’re up against a killer Astronomy test Monday morning, don’t worry. Pay someone who was in the class last year to replace you. After all, they have a better chance, and that’ll put you on an equal footing with the smart kids in the front of the class.
What a wonderful concept. Thank you, New Jersey Democrats.