The 2014 intramural season has come and gone faster than a Kojie-Moonie dating relationship. Championships have been won, tempers have been lost and glory has been found on the courts and in the pools of the Rec. This week alone, four teams added their names to the famed intramural championship hall, forever immortalized as the best-athletes-still-holding-onto-the-dream ACU has to offer.
The waterball and volleyball championships were played last night as this paper was in print, so the information that follows is simply my not-so-humble (and most likely accurate) prediction of what went down in intramurals Finals Week.
Women’s Champ Volleyball
I’ve said it before. What’s better than a Ko Jo Kai vs. Sigma Theta Chi showdown for all the marbles? This game probably couldn’t have gotten more intense unless the two teams were playing for a Starbucks gift card rather than a championship.
If my prediction is right, this championship match will go down as the longest in ACU intramural history. As if a three-set thriller wasn’t enough, it didn’t help that everyone, players included, took a break after the first two sets to refill their pumpkin spice lattes and iced caramel macchiatos and look at engagement rings online.
Kojies stay awake long enough to get revenge for the flag football championship loss to the Siggies and win their second title in as many years.
Men’s Champ Volleyball
The rematch of last year’s championship game was the talk of the town all week.
Could GSP dismantle the She Set Yes powerhouse that coasted through the regular season undefeated? Parker Tennet and the Gammas would need all the Bad Mama Jama they could muster to have a shot against Trey Arnett and his maple-syrup-drinking, igloo-dwelling Canadian teammate, along with the rest of She Set Yes.
Arnett spoke about the possibility of his team achieving the perfect season.
“Playing in the league ain’t no easy thing,” Arnett said. “You see us on TV and think you could do the same thing, when in reality, nobody sees the dedication we put in. Two-a-days, ice baths, four-hour scrimmages. Those are all things we never did, but we’d probably be even better if we did do them.”
GSP can be expected to raise its level of gameplay, and I wouldn’t write off a three-set match. But Arnett said he believes his team has what it takes to pull of the title defense in the end.
“We have a secret weapon up our sleeve that hasn’t been used all season,” Arnett said. “Actually, two. The first one is our spirit animal, the honey badger. Watch the documentary on Netflix, it will blow your mind. The second is Jedi mind tricks. You’ll never know what’s happening until it’s too late.”
My prediction is She Set Yes wins in straight sets, leaving GSP to join the Siggies in the Starbucks waiting line.
Women’s Waterball
GATA and Alpha Kai Omega waged war in the pool. Alpha Kai had shallow hopes of drowning GATA’s title streak at three, but the challengers were determined to bring everything they had to the table.
Waterball can certainly be deemed as the most violent intramural sport on ACU’s campus, and success is not only derived based on how many points a team scores, but also how many hospital visits one team causes the other to make during a match.
Because of the importance of last night’s championship game, I expected the tallies to be high in both categories.
Sure enough, GATA had Alpha Kai seeing red the entire match. I’m still unsure if it was the blood from the scratches, or those custom-embroidered GATA caps, but there was more kicking and screaming in the pool than you’d see on Shark Week.
In the end, GATA overpowered Alpha Kai and won 26-20 on the scoreboard, 3-2 in the broken rib department.
Men’s Waterball
GSP held a lead over Galaxy for much of the regular season matchup, only to lose by one point at the end of the game. It’s been a while since anyone has challenged Galaxy in the pool, and GSP might be the only team with an honest chance to end another team’s intramural winning streak.
Last night’s final brought more excitement to the pool than has been seen since Jesus joined his local waterball team and walked on water.
Despite Galaxy’s dominance over the past three years in the water, I don’t think enough punches can be thrown in this game to keep them on top. GSP will dethrone the defending champions in overtime, winning everyone’s favorite sport in which 14 men hug each other in a pool while wearing nothing but swim shorts and goofy headgear. I think Chang said it best”¦
Until next semester”¦
