Attached below is a story included in the Optimist’s annual Pessimist print edition. The Pessimist is published annually April 1 and includes entirely fake stories for satirical purposes.
Students will be whipping and nae naeing at 11 p.m. on April 15 inside the ACU Central Plant on campus.
Last fall, students participated in the first-ever contest.
It featured over 500 students and several prominent faculty and staff, including Dr. Phil Schubert, president of the university. This year, alumni are encouraged to join the event as a tribute to their alma mater’s classy dance moves. Tamara Long, vice president for enrollment management and student life’s office, was very delighted to hear this event is taking place for a second year.
“IF YOU HAVE RECEIVED AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT WHIP AND NAE NAE CONTEST, DO NOT OPEN,” Long said. “IT IS A PHISHING ATTEMPT TO GATHER YOUR INFORMATION.”
There’s no recorded winner from last year’s competition due to too many students in attendance. The top three finalists were K9 Fritter, Willie the Wildcat and Ms. Tammy.
Due to the disorganization of last year’s event, the Cabinet is taking over to help choose a clear whip and nae nae artist.
Nicole Mallet, CAB president and senior marketing and management major from San Antonio, said she’s ecstatic to see how this plays out.
“It’s ridiculous there wasn’t a winner last year,” Mallet said. “The CAB is focused on fostering community and we believe we can do that in this event.”
To win the competition, a contestant must consistently hit whips and nae naes to outlast their competitors. Mallet said the CAB is expecting an even larger turnout than last year and its Instagram post about the event got over 5500 likes. Kevin Campbell, senior vice president of operations, said this event is shockingly cheap to put on.
“What even is a whip and nae nae,” Campbell said. “I don’t understand this event or this dance move but it’s cheap, so I don’t care.”
What makes this year’s contest even more unique is the fact ACUTV is broadcasting the event live on ESPN+.
Last year, ACUTV made a documentary called, ‘The First Dance,’ about the NCAA Tournament runs in 2019 for men’s and women’s basketball.
Hutton Harris, the video production manager and ACUTV director, is working alongside ACUTV’s staff to create, ‘The Second Dance,’ documentary.
“The Second Dance is all about the Whip and Nae Nae Contest and I’m excited to share it with the ACU community,” Harris said. “There’s going to be behind the scenes shots that have never been seen before. You’ll feel the magic of this magical event.”
The event will start promptly at 11 p.m. on April 15 at the ACU Central Plant on Willingham Way and will be streamed on ESPN+.
