For years we have struggled against the oppression and bondage of slavery. We were told as early on that slavery has been abolished. We have heard the words "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights that among these are Life, Liberty and the ... [Read More…]
Movies necessary to understand society
This weekend I turned 24, and to celebrate, some friends and I watched John Carpenter's 1986 classic, Big Trouble in Little China. Out of the five of us watching, only I had seen the movie previously, so I was of course excited to share the experience with others. Now, I don't consider myself a movie buff, and there are plenty of movies that I've ... [Read More…]
This is not the speeding car you’re looking for
I got my first ticket this summer. Eight miles over the speed limit in the middle of nowhere-Menard-County. A whomping $180. I had always believed I was an invincible driver, like I had a sixth sense about cops. I just seemed to intuitively know when to slow my roll. This apparently didn't extend to sheriffs. My dooms-day sheriff was coming the ... [Read More…]
History and purpose of the woeful resume
I hate resume building. So much, in fact, that some of my least favorite words in college have become, "that will look good on your resume." Something about them makes me want to defiantly stop whatever it is that I'm doing that is deemed "resume-worthy" out of frustration, because that's not why I chose to do it in the first place. This approach, ... [Read More…]
What Apple could do with an auto
If you remember the article I wrote in "The Pessimist," our annual satirical issue, I joked briefly about Apple announcing the new iPhone 5G:SUV. But I've been thinking lately: What if it were true? This week, Apple announced the iPhone 5 and as usual, the tech world went bananas over it. But what if Apple instead announced the new iCar, or ... [Read More…]
One or two years, more or less
Two years ago today (Sept. 12), I met my best friend on the first Sunday afternoon of the 2010 NFL season. It was a normal, everyday meeting between two future best friends. What do you call that side room off of Edwards Lobby? The one with all the windows and the nice furniture and the beautiful HDTV? We should give that room a short, catchy ... [Read More…]
Haikus: how the paper is made
Like haikus, an issue of the Optimist is put together following a strict set of rules. Unlike haikus, an issue of the Optimist requires much more than 17 syllables. This is my attempt at making journalism seem poetic. About a week before the paper is published, our Managing Editor, Marissa (pronounced with disgust), sends out story assignments to ... [Read More…]
The waffle with waffle cones
Where are the waffle cones? I love ACU. I really do. But you can't expect me not to get a little upset when they take away my waffle cones. It was one big tease. One. Big. Lie. I remember the first day waffle cones entered my life at ACU. It was one of those events that just made the whole day special. I felt especially proud to be a ... [Read More…]
A cartoonist’s attempt at column writing
Hello there, Optimist reader! The editors have decided that it wasn't punishment enough to force you to read my comics. So now you must endure the horror that is my writing. Congratulations! I can't promise that this will be painless, but I can promise that it will be short, so try to take some solace in that. First off, my name is Evan Marks and ... [Read More…]
Lance Armstrong gives up fight
The man who beat cancer. That's what comes to my mind when I think of Lance Armstrong. Armstrong has become an American hero not only because of his status as a decorated cyclist, but also because of his perseverance in overcoming one of the most life-threatening illnesses of our time. At age 25, after his second Tour de France win, Armstrong ... [Read More…]
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