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You are here: Home / Opinion / Columns / Men, you’ll never understand women

Men, you’ll never understand women

February 14, 2003 by Joel Weckerly

Weck’s World

Happy Valentine’s Day! Well, for some, anyway. A lot of guys around campus seem to think this day encompasses the very downfall of society. And with good reason, I suppose. Guys think about girls enough as it is, and most of them don’t need a special day reserved for the frustrations of trying to figure out the female gender.

The only comforting thought for males is that we’re not the only ones battling these frustrations.

There’s this story I’ve been told about a man who was walking deep in prayer along a California beach. All of a sudden, he said out loud, “Lord, grant me one wish.”

The sky clouded above his head and a booming voice from above said, “Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.”

The surprised man replied, “Build a bridge to Hawaii, so I can drive over any time I want.”

“Your request is very materialistic,” the Lord said. “Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honor and glorify me.”

The man nodded, then furrowed his brow in deep thought. Finally, he looked up and said, “Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say ‘nothing’ and how I can make a woman truly happy.”

The Lord replied, “You want two lanes or four on that bridge?”

But God’s interaction with man regarding woman goes much further back in the realm of time.

Recall, if you will, the days in the Garden of Eden when God had given Adam all the companions He thought he needed, but they just weren’t enough for the lonely man.

“Lord, all these animals are great, but there’s just something that’s missing,” he pleaded.

God replied, “What do you need, my son?”

“I need a woman,” said Adam. “She will be a companion who will go with me wherever I go, who will love me until the day we die, who will be loyal, trustworthy and understanding. I need her to support me through all the decisions that I make, always be on my side even if her friends are not. She will be forgiving and never hold a grudge. She will be an amazing servant, while at the same time an amazing companion.”

God said to Adam, “I will give you this woman that you request, but not without a price. This gift to you will cost you your right arm, your left leg and one of your eyes.”

Adam considered the deal and said, “Gee, Lord, that sure is a lot to ask. What can you give me for a rib?”

There you have it. So if you’re frustrated this Valentine’s Day, fellas, don’t blame yourself, don’t even blame girls. Blame Adam.

Filed Under: Columns Tagged With: Valentine's Day

Other Opinion:

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About Joel Weckerly

You are here: Home / Opinion / Columns / Men, you’ll never understand women

Other Opinion:

  • When coffee stops helping and starts hurting

  • Student attendance makes a difference at games

  • Normalize counseling on campus

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