Sometimes I wonder why I went to a university whose school color is purple.

We claim we are Christian and have a huge focus on the ‘C’ in our name, yet our color is blatantly unchristian.

At VBS I learned a song called “Jesus Loves the Little Children.” This song seems to have a pretty inclusive title. Yet in the middle of the song it has clear restrictions on just who falls into the “loved” category.

“Red and Yellow, Black and White, they are precious in his sight.”

I do not see purple in that list.

There is a proverb which states “Truth fears no trial.”

That saying was put to the test in 1958 when a talented musician came out with a song that rose to the top and hit No. 1 in the billboard pop charts. If his song had been false or even held a shred of falsehood, it would not have been welcomed or upheld by the masses.

That musician was named Sheb Wooley, the song, “The Purple People Eater.”

A long time ago there were Purple People, and subsequently, Purple People Eaters.

Do I really need to explain what happened? The Purple People were eaten. Then the Purple People Eaters starved to death. Which is why we don’t see any Purple People Eaters today.

For those who doubt what I have ascertained and think that “Purple” applies to the color of the eater and not the people being ingested, I answer you thus: If the People Eaters were purple and ate any “people” why did they starve to death? I thought we had an overpopulation problem.

I, as I’m sure many of you, grew up in the Church of Christ. The Church of Christ has often been very particular about the rules and sacraments ordained in Scripture. If this university is based on Church of Christ principles, why are we wearing that color? If we want to maintain a Christian image why are we parading around in purple?

In conclusion, God is the Creator, and he created the Purple People Eaters to eat the Purple People. Why would God create a carnivorous creature to consume them? It’s illogical unless you come to the conclusion that God does not, in fact, like Purple People.

So ACU admit your folly and change the colors to something more appropriate. And students, support your religious beliefs; don’t wear purple.